Monday, November 19, 2012

What's this?

You:    Hold on a minute, is that... another conrod?? But... didn't you just recently, already buy a new pair of conrods and entrust them to an allegedly professional "machine shop" to drill a relatively simple oil passage, as well as other more difficult machining jobs?

Me:   Why, yes, yes it is and yes I did.

You:   So what are you doing with a third one?

Me:   Well, the "machine shop" used an old, worn out bit to drill the hole, 'cause they figured it was just a small hole (1.5mm) in aluminium, which must surely be like tinfoil, so an old bit would surely do (that way they can save a couple of euros on a new bit, clever!), and of course it snapped, got lodged in there and they then kept using bigger and bigger bits to try and drill their way out of the problem. Then they tried to tell us that it was just fine, all it needed was a bush pressed in, another hole drilled in, no problem, good as new. Well, actually no, it would not be good as new. So yes, the "machine shop" fucked up a very expensive conrod and tried to make it look like it was no big deal. Luckily Peppe was in no mood for bullshit and apparently got them to agree to pay for this new one I just got. Of course I don't believe they will, but whatever, we've come this far.

You:   So, let me get this right, this is Italy, which is supposed to be a shining beacon of engineering excellence, and this is supposed to be the most reliable machine shop in Rome...

Me:   Please use inverted commas when you refer to them, I can no longer in good conscience refer to that grotesque rabble of lobotomised goons as a legitimate engineering outfit.

You:   Sorry, so yeah isn't it supposed to be the best "machine shop" in the area?

Me:  Shocking, ain't it? Let me give you some advice: you want something done right? Do it yourself, and if you can't, send it off to the UK. It might take longer and seem like it's more expensive, but if the alternative is paying a little less, BUT THREE TIMES, then you quickly realise that it's actually cheaper to get the job done right, once.

You:   Wow, I had no idea things were this bad, and you would think with all the great cars and bikes that came out of Italy...

Me:   I know, but there is nothing left in this country that's worth anything other than some good food and some nice places. Not to mention that the great cars and bikes you mention are great only in a nostalgic, overly-forgiving, stereotyped collective imagination, whereas in actual facts they were all rubbish.

UPDATE! I was told by Peppe that the "machine shop" did another performance worthy of their reputation, on another bike, just recently: a phosphor-bronze valve guide they had made turned out to be far too tight, which resulted in a bent valve and a nicked piston. This happened on a Maney equipped Norton special, a rather expensive piece of kit...


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